Tackling your monkey

You may know your monkey, you might actually be very aware of them or even talk to them regularly. You might feel like you are really good friends or that you work together quite well, your monkey keeps you in check. Or you might just be a little confused and not know what I am talking about because you have such an intimate relationship with your monkey that you mistake their voice for yours.

Either way, the monkey is there and very present and provides us with constant mind chatter! They tell us all sorts of stories: we are not slim enough, we are not clever enough, our friend is more successful than us, our children need to be more active, our children need to be less active, we do not work hard enough, we are missing out on opportunities, etc.

What if I told you that all of the above is 100% your monkey imposing on our thoughts? You would probably start to argue with me and start to negotiate that some points made by the monkey are indeed true and /or useful.

This is where the PQ operating system comes in. Instead of monkey we call those intrusive thoughts 'Saboteurs' (you can stick with the monkey, if you like). Not only are those saboteur/monkey thoughts very critical of us, others and our circumstances, it also appears that we never have to invite them in, as they are like that unwanted guest, which we are too polite to ask to leave. we just start to live with them and might even grow to value their presence and opinion like the creatures of habit that we are.

These saboteur thoughts are there by default, though, not by choice. The power of our saboteur/monkey thoughts and the way they control our relationships, wellness, parenting, career, conflicts, creativity and everything else in our lives happens by default. We do not have to do anything at all for the saboteurs to do their continuous work. While our brain is in this state, we do not make conscious decisions, we are merely following a pattern. We are running on autopilot and are not operating in a way that serves us!

Our brain is wired to simplify information in order to function. So, most of the time our brain sorts out information and fills in the gaps to make sense of our experiences. In many ways this can be very helpful. If we look at a bowl of red liquid our brain will probably tell us that this must be tomato soup. It will add a lot of information (assumptions) to the visual picture. This is helpful, as the brain would be overwhelmed, if it had to always start from scratch.

However, this system works so well and efficiently that we are not aware of the connections and patterns we create and we end up in a modus operandi .

The PQ (positive intelligence) operating system suggests that we can catch our saboteur/monkey thoughts and intercept the patterns through PQ reps (more on that in the next piece) to regain control over our thoughts and learn better self-command. This allows us to switch to our PQ brain. We switch our brain from a reactive mode to an active mode in which we can make radically different decisions, because we are back in charge and we quieten the voice of our saboteur/monkey.

The next step, is to exercise and strengthen the sage muscle in our brain in order to respond to ourselves, others and circumstances in a more positive way which works for us. This can be done through visualising past and future responses to situations, in order to change a pattern (more on that in a follow-up

piece)

Challenge yourself to listen out for your monkey/saboteur and see what they tell you and how familiar that voice sounds to you. A very well established phrase they like to use is 'I need to...' or 'I should...'

I would love to hear what your monkey/saboteur tells you and whether or not you seem to be BFFs :-) indulge me with your comments!